david and goliath

Here we are at the near end of yet another semester of college. After a year and a half of this stuff you'd think I'd be a pro at it. WRONG! Guys..... This semester was SO hard. So so so so hard. 

That's why the theme has been appropriately declared as trial of the faith.

It has been such a trial of my faith. And at times, I felt like I was in a deep dark hole that I couldn't ever climb out of. The amount of stress has been crippling. The soccer season was pretty much hell. There's always some kind of drama with boys. School, friends, soccer, my confidence, literally everything has been on the rocks at one point or another. 

Talk about baggage haha.

I have never been so physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually exhausted in my entire life. Seriously there are no words to describe how hard it has been. I feel like the flood gates burst and trial upon trial has been poured out upon my life. 

I had more than one breakdown. One of which included standing in the middle of the kitchen sobbing my eyes out because the chocolate chip cookies were taking too long in the oven. Well, the cookies and 6439286429 other things I felt were weighing down on me. But halfway through the semester, I had a talk with my coach. He could tell I wasn't on my A game as an athlete and as a person. So he just asked if I was okay (which obviously I wasn't) and then proceeded to tell me about David and Goliath.

We are all fighting battles each and every day. It might be a test that we feel completely unprepared for, or a friend who don't understand how to be a good friend. It might be a lacerated kidney (shout out to you Rachel), or even spiritual battles. Whatever it is... we are David fighting our own personal Goliaths each and every day. We might feel like there is no way that we can go to war and come out on top. Everything might be pinned against us. But I'm gonna let you in on a little secret.....

 SPOILER ALERT: David wins.

David wins! With literally nothing going his way, he wins. BUT HOW??!!!!

 Many brave warriors stepped up to the challenge of fighting Goliath, yet not one of them found success. They each approached the battle the same way. Hand to hand combat, fully clothed in heavy armor. They were basically handing themselves over to Goliath on a silver platter. Since he suffered from gigantism, Goliath had to fight up close. He needed to use his strength to take down his enemies with his hands because he had terrible vision. Goliath had to fight a certain way and everyone accepted that. They all approached him in the same way and were surprised when they got the same results.

David was the exception. He recognized that it was possible to win the fight if he approached it in a different way. David was half of Goliath's size, not the most skilled at fighting, and definitely not the number one pick for any team's draft.

But he didn't let that hold him back. He stepped up to the fight confident and ready to take down Goliath and that's exactly what he did. 

So that's what we have to do!!!

Trials suck. But here's the reality of the situation. We need them to grow. That is part of our great purpose here on earth! We are sent trials to test our faith and our willingness to stay on the Lord's side. We are here fighting the good fight and I will continue to battle with everything I have until the fight is won.

But sometimes..... most of the time... we can't fight all on our own. We need a homie to help us out! And we are so in luck. We have Jesus Christ fighting right by our side. There is no other person that can give us the strength that we need to get through the day, the week, the semester. The atonement is there for our sins and resurrection, but it is also there for every other aspect of our lives. President Boyd K Packer explained: "He had no debt to pay. He committed no wrong. Nevertheless an accumulation of all of the guilt, the grief and sorrow, the pain and humiliation, of all the mental, emotional, and physical torments known to man--he experienced them all." Isn't that incredible? There is nothing that we feel or experience that the Savior hasn't already felt or experienced. Pains, weakness, sickness, loneliness, stress, heartache, failure, rejection.... the list goes on and on. But Christ knows how to give us comfort and relief and strength to overcome our struggles and our suffering because he willingly experienced them as an essential part of his atonement. 

"I can do all things through Christ who strengtheneth me."

Christ is our battle partner. But guess what? He won't give us help unless we ask for it! We all need to seek him and ask for the blessings of the atonement upon us. He is perfectly positioned to lift us and  give us the strength we need to endure our afflictions. All we have to do is remember to ask. You might think we're doing fine on our own until you have a breakdown in the kitchen over cookies like I did... 

Guys... we are never fine on our own. 

We NEED Christ to succor us. 

Allowing him to  help us with any aspect of our struggles can be the sweetest experience. The Savior is there for all of us and he will wrap us up in his warm loving arms if we remember to turn to him. He might not take our trials away but he will ABSOLUTELY give us the power and patience to get through them. He will make weak things become strong. I KNOW this to be true. 

Many times this semester I have been desperate for relief. I have needed to take a step back and approach the fight in a completely different way. And even though I'm stubborn and like to do things for myself on my own.. I have needed the Savior's help. 

THE ATONEMENT IS REAL AND IT WORKS.

I have never felt as close to my savior as I do now. First comes trials, and if we endure them well, next comes blessings. The flood gates of trials that had burst have now been rebuilt stronger than ever and I have been beyond blessed. Seriously you guys. This has been the hardest semester but it has also been the best because of all the blessings that have come out of it. 

I have grown so much over the past four months. And I am SO happy! The Sierra that came home from college in the spring is long gone and a more mature, understanding Sierra has taken her place!!

(hahaha more mature as I talk about myself in third person. it's fine)

I love SVU with all of my heart. And I have a new love for trials too. All I know is that life is good and experience is good and God is good and his timing is perfect. I needed this semester. I don't really know why, but I do know that because I survived it, I'm a better person.